Judging Me.

It''s been a while since I blogged. To say I've been neglecting this blog would be acceptable, but I doubt anyone ever read it anymore. I suppose I should be apologizing for what exactly I don't know but I just feel like I should tell. Ever since I stared school, again. I get so weird until people would scare the shit out of themselves. There are some ups & down in life, there are some high & low situation in life and there are also some emotions that could not be describe by words. Lately people are judging me for my misbehaviour. But you know what? Who are them to judge me? Who are them to hurt me against their words sharp like knives. Who are them to take me down? This is actually my life, this is what I enjoy to do with my life. If their life is so precious they would not even bother to get in my so called boring life. Stop judging me because you don't have the rights to do so. I am tired answering some question in life that I don't even know the answer. Such as ; How can I heal a cut so deep? How can  ever believe that there is someone for me out there? How can I be so dumb? How will the pain ever go away? 
I never have the time for myself and everytime I come back, everything just seemed to be wrong. Everything seems so useless and pointless. Like the presence of me coming back home is not welcomed by anyone. I never have the right amount of sleep and I've been restless for the past weeks. I always seem to be a failure in everyone's eyes; especially in my own eyes. A sadness that overwhelms me. Everytime I close my eyes I just feel so..... helpless. 
Everything is so jumbled up in my very fucked up mind.